Tag Archives: comics

Bodycount (1996) – TMNT’s Raph on a Rampage

Bodycount (1996), by Kevin Eastman and Simon Bisley, is a Ninja Turtles comic book with attitude. In many ways, they were trying hard to take the Turtles back from the hit TV series, back to their indie comic roots, and tap into the market of kids like me who had grown up with Raph, Mikey, Leo, and Donnie. In the end, the 4-part series is a grindhouse spectacle that hardly holds together. But who cares! It had lots of blood and boobs, Casey Jones and Raph being badasses, and a villain straight out of Terminator 2: Judgement Day (1991)

Bodycount 1996

And Julie Strained…
By the time the first comic came out, we — the kids who grew up on the first animated show — were teenagers ourselves, in high school. That’s 1996, around the same time that Penthouse Pet Julie Strain was splashed all over Heavy Metal Magazine. Knowing Kevin Eastman’s fascination with her, and that she modeled for both Kevin and Simon’s drawings, it’s not hard to see why Midnight looks just like her. In fact, Kevin and Strain had married in 1995. Still, you couldn’t get a better mix if you wanted to appeal to Turtles fans who were already fighting to control their hormones. April O’Neil in latex, maybe?

Julie Strain as Midnight in Bodycount (1996)

So, taken in the context of the target market, Bodycount hit the mark. But teenagers aren’t stupid, and I think we probably felt the flaws in the comic, even if we couldn’t articulate them then. The writing is difficult to digest, and the images can be hard to decipher. It’s hard for me to take my editor’s cap off, so let’s talk about spelling wuicklu quickly. The comics are full of errors, such as “calvary” instead of “cavalry”, “to” instead of “too”, and “Santuary” instead of “Sanctuary”, which is one of the most important locations in the story. It becomes hard to know if you’re missing a joke or reading too much into the bad copy.

Art-wise, Bisley’s London-punk style is great, but sometimes too simple, like the three-dimensional rectangles that we’re supposed to read as pistols. There are inconsistencies too, much like with the spelling, such as Johnny’s hand looking normal in some panels, or Midnight firing her pistol with her left and then her right hand in the next panel. It gets a bit too looney, too. What’s that weird monkey leprechaun about anyway?

Leprechaun Monkey in Bodycount (1996)

But okay, Bodycount is still fun and entertaining, like a bad accident set to rousing classical music. This is, after all, an indie comic, and that’s why I love it. Don’t expect polish. Don’t expect any real maturity (hey, when have the Turtles ever been mature?), and just enjoy the wild, wild ride.

3 out of 5 Chibi-thulhus.

3 Cheeky Cthulhus

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Dr Fate #8 (1988) — When Comics Almost Hook You

DC’s Dr Fate #8 is next on our radar for some raw reviewing. And oh, what a ride. A lot like the taxi ride between airports, in a foreign country. Confusing, frustrating, and enticing.

Dr Fate 8

Here’s the gist of these reviews: I grab a random comic, give it a read, then tell you about it. So let’s do it. Grab onto something!

The Good

Esoteric adventures, body possession, undead beings, the cosmic balance in the… erm… balance, and a hero trying to learn to control her powers. These are some of the reasons why I love comics, and they’re all here.

The Bad

Comic creators have learned that their readers have very short attention spans, and often a reader is jumping into a comic series after the beginning. None of those usual ploys they use to keep readers in the loop are evident here, so I was confused. There’s so much going on here that you feel like it’s all-important, as if you’re a five-year-old listening to an astronaut explain the physics of rockets.

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The Meh

The art and colour work isn’t noteworthy, but that cover, wow. Dr. Fate delivers heaps of emotion in this cover, and it got me interested in the cover’s series as a whole. Some very unique pieces, for sure, but that’s not enough to get me to buy into this series.

In the end, I know there’s something cool going on here, but I’m not going to put effort into finding it, because there’s just so much more to read. If you are a Dr Fate fan, though, please sound off in the comments. I’d love to hear your thought’s on the series.

Overall, 3 out of 5 Chibi-Cthulhu!

3 Cheeky Cthulhus

 

The Umbrella Academy is a Hammy Cheese-Fest

Do you like ham and cheese? I hope you do. I love ham and cheese. The hammier and cheezier, the better. The Umbrella Academy has both, in equal measure, and it’s a tasty feast… if that’s your sort of thing. Let’s check out the first collection, We dive into The Apocalypse Suite.

The Umbrella Academy

Let me explain, because I might be losing you already. The comic has a murderous Eiffel Tower, a character with a monocle called (you guessed it) The Monocle, and a Murder Bot set to “Careless Brutality”. And that’s why this comic is brilliant.

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The Great

The Umbrella Academy manages to poke fun at superhero comics, while being a part of the family. It never feels like a rip-off of X-Men, even though it’s a hilarious fun-house mirror-image of super-mutant hero teams. That humour is the hammy, cheesy goodness. You’re either going to love it or hate it.

The story’s pace and the depth of the characters were other high points for me. Because most of the story happens after the main characters have passed their prime, the story just wouldn’t have worked if they’d not been well developed. Essentially, you’re getting a story that feels like it exists in a much bigger one, and that the characters have plenty of history left to explore.

More Great Stuff

Gabriel Ba’s art is perfect for The Umbrella Academy because it works with the hammy cheesiness at the soul of this comic. Ba’s art is also grim when it needs to be, sombre when needed, and never confusing. Ba tells a better visual story than many artists who’ve worked for Marvel or DC.

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The Not so Great

It’s a bit of a weird thing about the comic, but you don’t learn each hero’s power until the mini-comics at the end of this six-comic anthology. Their powers are in the main comic, but Gerard’s subtlety might mean you miss it. Is that a good thing? Does it really matter? Probably not. Maybe that’s there to tell you what kind of story this really is? You decide.

Overall, a great read if you like clever shlock or you’re a fan of the comic book medium. Four out of five Cheeky Cthulhus!

4 out of 5 Cheeky Cthulhus


Hawk and Dove: Countdown (#7, Dec ’89)

Hawk and Dove: Countdown (#7, Dec ’89) is written by Barbara and Karl Kesel, with Greg Guler penciling and Scott Hanna inking. This one is worth a look.

I think DC just made a new fan!

(Honestly, I never thought I’d say that. Make mine Marvel! Okay, okay, make mine Marvel and Dove. It’s just one exception. Oh, and Mouse Guard. Fine. Make mine Marvel, Mice, and Dove.)

Hawk and Dove #7

The Good

Hawk and Dove #7 was written by wife and husband team Barbara and Karl Kesel, and they represent the titular guy and gal duo perfectly. This issue opens with Dawn Granger (Dove) being chased through a spooky house by its occultish occupants and their pet tigers. Despite the danger, Dawn doesn’t swoon at the first sign of trouble or kick butt with abandon; she feels real enough, which helps the suspense build without the damsel-in-distress vibes we dudes are so fond of writing.

Dawn is the perfect partner for the brash Hank Hall (Hawk), who we meet next. He’s the muscle, she’s the brains. It might seem simple, but the tension in their relationship works and keeps the story flowing.

There’s no romantic twist to the story, at least not yet, which helps the team stand out from other comic teams. This isn’t Scott Summers and Jean Grey, or Peter Parker and Felicia Hardy, and I appreciate that. (I still love you guys!)

Overall, it’s a well-written comic.

Notable Points
Action on every page, drama, great art, monsters, mysterious villains, esoteric magic, this issue delivers all of that in spades.

Also, the fashion represented in this issue is far more tasteful, while still sexy, than anything I’ve seen in other DC comics from this era. No cringy 80’s music video vibes, and that’s worth a star all by itself!

Seek This Out
I’ll be looking for more Hawk and Dove for sure. They might not be as well known as Superman, Batman, or the Flash, but this team has something worthy of your attention.

4 out of 5 Cheeky Cthulhus!

4 out of 5 Cthulus

 


Flash: Red Trinity (#7, December ‘87)

Flash: Red Trinity (#7, December ‘87), by Baron, Guice, and Mahlstedt. This is gonna be fast, so try to keep up…

Flash: Red Trinity (Flash #7, Dec '87)

Yes, yes, yes, yes, and YES. Finally, some hot-blooded hero action, an engaging plot, and the character development we need.

The Good

Tina’s plight now has me hooked. Real consequences, that’s what we needed. This issue has action on most pages too, so the soap opera vibe of issues #2 and Flash #5 is gone. Joy!

I’m tempted to go back and fill out my collection, and if a comic can do that, it has won half the battle.

The Bad

McGee (Flash #5) was basically evil Flash. The new baddies, the Red Trinity team, adds three more Flash-wannabes. You can guess what Blue Trinity will give us. Is the concept of super speedy people that interesting that we need eight of them? I’ve also heard of this Reverse-Flash dude, and I know about Impulse. Impulse works because he has a strong character flaw: he’s impulsive. At this point, the villains seem like they were only written with super speed so they could keep up with the main character, and that’s boring.

What about a bad guy that could make Flash go even faster? Uncontrollably fast. Too-fast-Flash could be a real danger to himself and others. Doppelganger-Flash one through 7 is just repetitive and confusing. And I’ve lost track of who is who in Red Trinity already.

Synopsis

Flash’s powers make him the ultimate plot device; a master of the segue. Think about it. He’s able to reach the next scene before the reader. That must make him difficult to write. There’s no need for a shot of a jet flying off to the next mission, no pause before the next battle. Instant combat, just add water. As a writer, you probably need to spend a lot of time slowing the Flash down.

This ish gets a solid 3 out of 5 Cheeky Cthulhus from me. It’s worth reading if you can get your hands on it, but there really isn’t anything amazing going on here, so it’s not a must-have. If you’re a die-hard Flash fan, then maybe check out Flash: Red Trinity anyway.

3 out of 5 Cheeky Cthulhus


Flash #5: Speed McGee (October ‘87): #CritFail

Flash #5: Speed McGee (October ‘87), by Baron, Guice, and Torrance. Let’s take a peek.

You can find our look at Flash #2 here on the Rising Phoenix Games blog.

Flash #5: Speed McGee
Yes, yes you can judge this one by its cover.

Here we get to a well-known issue with older DC comics.

The Good

The comic opens on a scene of graphic domestic abuse, then goes on to blame the wife-beater’s violent streak on steroids. Well done to DC for tackling tough issues.

The Bad

Unfortunately, the story doesn’t make great use of the setup. Wally (Flash) meets Tina (whose husband is mainlining ‘roids into his increasingly angry brain) in a very public restaurant. You’d expect the big floppy hat, scarf in summer, and dark glasses, but still, would anybody really manage to meet in public? Especially when your appointment is with the Flash, the same guy who can be anywhere, instantly?

Wally and Tina are quick to hook up, even after she affirms her loyalty to her deranged husband, making the wife-beating feel like a thin excuse for Wally to get the girl. Was it necessary?

The Ugly

In 22 pages you get 13 boring shots of the Flash in his full kit, while you get 20 great shots of the villain being a bad Flash that takes only 4 pages. I thought I came here to see superheroes?

Still, I’d be fine with the villain flexing if the drama was good.

So, here’s the crunch.

In the Marvel vs DC showdown of the 80s, Marvel was known for writing identifiable characters we could sympathise with. Peter Parker having issues with his boss? We get that. Rogue trying to fit in? Been there. The Hulk struggling to manage his temper? Now you’re getting personal.

The Wally-Flash, on the other hand, has millionaire problems. He’s twenty, she’s 31. He’s single, she’s married. Should he? Shouldn’t he? Come on!

Overall, Issue #5’s tough-to-stomach premise made the millionaire-problems even more unpalatable.

Hard skip.